We might be in 2019 but unfortunately even today, a live-in relationship is still a concept that is looked down upon in our country. Couples who are brave enough to be in a live-in relationship mostly live in the metro cities. It is almost impossible to live with your partner in a small town unless you pull a whole Bollywood movie storyline and act like you’re married. This tells us how India isn’t really there when it comes to topics like live-in relationships, premarital sex and basically freedom of choice.
Although I have a handful of friends who have been or are currently in live-in relationships, every single one of them has a different opinion on how the whole experience has been and how it has impacted their lives. While some are all praises about it, a few others weren’t really fans. Which is why, we have listed down some of the pros and cons of being in a live-in relationship, in case you are thinking of moving in with a special someone of yours.
1. Testing Time
Moving in with your partner before tying the knot gives you a trial period. You get to know a person much better once you start living with them as you get to know more of their day-to-day habits. Also, when you’re seeing your girlfriend or boyfriend for a few hours in a day, you tend to make the best use of that time and mostly behave well with each other. But when you’re living together, things get real and it’s not always nice. And that is when you truly understand each other for the best or the worst.
2. Saving Money
Believe it or not but living together can save up so much of your money. You both split the household expenses equally. Plus, you don’t have to spend money every time you see each other anymore, date nights can be shifted to your living room when you both are broke. And if you’re going out, you don’t have to drop each other off and pay double the cab fare anymore.
3. Freedom To Walk Out, Make Decisions, Etc.
Being in a live-in relationship gives both the partners freedom of choice to a major extent. You’re not legally bound, so you can always walk out of the relationship if things aren’t working out at all. The ‘log kya kahenge‘ narrative won’t have come into the picture yet, because at least in the Indian context, your family is left out of your live-in relationship. You both can live on your own terms with mutual understanding.
4. Better Bond
People can only bond truly when they are 100% real with each other. And when you’re in a live-in relationship, you automatically start becoming comfortable around each other. You start to share your deepest fears and secrets with each other, which is a great sign of having mutual trust.
1. Honeymoon Phase Has Passed
If you get married after being in a live-in relationship with your partner, you may realise that the honeymoon phase has already ended. Since you’ve already been living together, you both get comfortable around each other and the need to impress the other person constantly is much lesser.
2. Societal Stigma
You may be of the opinion that there is not a single thing wrong or bad with live-in relationships. Unfortunately, our society may disagree. Couples who want to live together firstly face a lot of trouble finding an apartment. Once they manage to get a decent place for themselves, they are then constantly judged by their neighbours, landlords and the people around them.
3. Sharing Space
This may not happen with every live-in couple out there but it is a common issue that I’ve heard of. If your idea of clean and your partner’s idea of clean is completely different, then sharing an apartment with them could sometimes start making you feel frustrated. For instance, if you’re someone who likes to keep your surroundings neat and your partner is super messy, then living with each other could become a huge task for both you.
Although there are both pros and cons to this, it also depends from person to person. I’ve known many who’ve realized they’re not meant for each other after living together and many others who’ve happily transitioned from living in to being married. So, do what you feel is right for you and see how it goes.
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